Confession
8-29-06 Confession
I loved her skin the first time I saw her. Face first. Then the smoothness of her legs. She was kind. Although I always wonder about that later. Going back to the beginning I mean. Where all the primal elements were first revealed. You find out things later you didn't want to know that were not obvious at the outset. But they must have been there inside the skin and bones & tissues at the very beginning in some way. I do not believe they were later superimposed from without. Though again stranger things have happened. For instance, what is the source material for our dreams? Do they come from within or without? I contend some dreams come from within and some come totally from the outside. The latter are implants. Thus there may be superimposed values on the psyche also. Values that did not originate in the organism itself but came from without. Though now that I have written it down on the white page I am helpless to defend such seemingly unsubstantiated processes. I doubt it. Big deal. How will we ever prove any of this to everybody's lasting satisfaction? That is the question that must be answered with authority. For therein lies the cure to the problem.
A man confesses to a major crime and is promptly arrested on the basis of much innuendo---most of it spouted by the suspect himself to many and diverse sources. He has a need to kill? No. He has a need to believe. He tells of his love for the victim. Never does he suggest he had violent thoughts against her. Perhaps he believes he keeps her alive by putting her name back in the headlines after many years of silence. Putting her picture back on the front pages of all the tabloids and splashed all over cable news television screens. The dancing girl is back and he has been her Easter, the source of her resurrection. She has a kind of life again. She lives inside the mind of every viewer who has seen her photograph and heard the lurid details of her death. And then heard the gentle telling of this man who claims to have been her lover and liberator. She died by accident he says in his very presence. Did he kill her? No. But is he guilty? He says yes. He feels responsible. It is a long and complicated story. He cannot release the entire tale to us now it would take too long he avers.
Jesus said if you've thought it in your heart you are guilty of the deed-----adultery, murder, theft. Whoso has commited adultery in his heart the same person is as guilty as the actual perpetrator. It is the same thing in the eyes of god. Well, the legal system takes a slightly different view on this. You confess to the priest. He sits in the box silently and listens to you confess your crimes. Then he offers you forgiveness via The Divine Process with a rejoinder or two. You must perform some functions of the church in order to clear your conscience with the Almighty and the church. Is there forgiveness for crimes not commited but confessed to---wanted to be in some way commited? Perhaps he just wanted to be there---at the scene of the crime watching and sympathizing with the victim. This would appear to be the case. Thus he is guilty of lying. But the lie was composed in order to conceal a desire for reconciliation with the now deceased victim of a crime he regrets he was not at hand to witness and experience. An aspect of The Fortunate Fall.
RLG copyright 2006
I loved her skin the first time I saw her. Face first. Then the smoothness of her legs. She was kind. Although I always wonder about that later. Going back to the beginning I mean. Where all the primal elements were first revealed. You find out things later you didn't want to know that were not obvious at the outset. But they must have been there inside the skin and bones & tissues at the very beginning in some way. I do not believe they were later superimposed from without. Though again stranger things have happened. For instance, what is the source material for our dreams? Do they come from within or without? I contend some dreams come from within and some come totally from the outside. The latter are implants. Thus there may be superimposed values on the psyche also. Values that did not originate in the organism itself but came from without. Though now that I have written it down on the white page I am helpless to defend such seemingly unsubstantiated processes. I doubt it. Big deal. How will we ever prove any of this to everybody's lasting satisfaction? That is the question that must be answered with authority. For therein lies the cure to the problem.
A man confesses to a major crime and is promptly arrested on the basis of much innuendo---most of it spouted by the suspect himself to many and diverse sources. He has a need to kill? No. He has a need to believe. He tells of his love for the victim. Never does he suggest he had violent thoughts against her. Perhaps he believes he keeps her alive by putting her name back in the headlines after many years of silence. Putting her picture back on the front pages of all the tabloids and splashed all over cable news television screens. The dancing girl is back and he has been her Easter, the source of her resurrection. She has a kind of life again. She lives inside the mind of every viewer who has seen her photograph and heard the lurid details of her death. And then heard the gentle telling of this man who claims to have been her lover and liberator. She died by accident he says in his very presence. Did he kill her? No. But is he guilty? He says yes. He feels responsible. It is a long and complicated story. He cannot release the entire tale to us now it would take too long he avers.
Jesus said if you've thought it in your heart you are guilty of the deed-----adultery, murder, theft. Whoso has commited adultery in his heart the same person is as guilty as the actual perpetrator. It is the same thing in the eyes of god. Well, the legal system takes a slightly different view on this. You confess to the priest. He sits in the box silently and listens to you confess your crimes. Then he offers you forgiveness via The Divine Process with a rejoinder or two. You must perform some functions of the church in order to clear your conscience with the Almighty and the church. Is there forgiveness for crimes not commited but confessed to---wanted to be in some way commited? Perhaps he just wanted to be there---at the scene of the crime watching and sympathizing with the victim. This would appear to be the case. Thus he is guilty of lying. But the lie was composed in order to conceal a desire for reconciliation with the now deceased victim of a crime he regrets he was not at hand to witness and experience. An aspect of The Fortunate Fall.
RLG copyright 2006
posted by rlg at 3:26 PM
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