Romance & Marriage & Family
17 Feb. 06
America is still at this late date dominated by a very damaging & possessive puritanism---the whole notion of ownership sucks the vitality out of so many promising ventures. I mean the idea whereby we believe we can own people by virtue or vice of our large bank accounts or our powerful position in society. The institution of marriage must have been formed to satisfy the needs of society as a whole. The creation of the legal family was intended to eliminate the chaos wrought by promiscuous sexual behavior, for instance, among other things. Thus adultery is a capital crime in many nations yet today--usually applied only to women. (I.e., marriage is tantamount to incarceration in many countries & also I surmise in many "homes" in the USA). The institution of marriage does seem to have degenerated in our country. Albert Camus wrote that "bourgeoise marriage has put our country into slippers and will soon lead it to the gates of death." I am not against marriage. In fact I wish I was in a good marriage myself at this very moment. But I am raising the question concerning the actual state of adult romantic relationships both inside and outside of the institution. To me the important thing is keeping love alive. And in a way that is my lifetime occupation. What else is the true business of creation, of art, of writing? It is in my estimation to create a world of desire that stands in place of the mundane world you & i too easily accept in its decadent state. I mean this literally. I am writing a handbook for love. It may take me a lifetime to complete.
The only true marriage I recognize is one of consenting equals. And it looks to me what we now have for the most part is an institution of slavery: Owners & victims. Well, we asked for it. We start out with the assumption a good marriage is based on true love between a man and a woman of equal parts. These two individual persons decided without coercion from the outside world to enter into a secular and sacred union and to become one person (a mystical union) sacramentalized in the marriage ceremony. In fact marriage is one of the 7 sacraments in the Roman Catholic Church. Is this the actual marriage situation that exists in America today: A union of equals whose freedom is extended by this formal bond which liberates the two persons from the distractions of a wildly sexual & Pleasure-loaded society of promiscuous objects of Desire that surround them on all sides? This is not what I am given to feel. What I feel & have felt for a long time is that marriage today among my contemporaries is merely a facade that conceals a totally unequal series of relationships between the "designated" partners who entered into a "marriage contract."
RLG copyright 2006
America is still at this late date dominated by a very damaging & possessive puritanism---the whole notion of ownership sucks the vitality out of so many promising ventures. I mean the idea whereby we believe we can own people by virtue or vice of our large bank accounts or our powerful position in society. The institution of marriage must have been formed to satisfy the needs of society as a whole. The creation of the legal family was intended to eliminate the chaos wrought by promiscuous sexual behavior, for instance, among other things. Thus adultery is a capital crime in many nations yet today--usually applied only to women. (I.e., marriage is tantamount to incarceration in many countries & also I surmise in many "homes" in the USA). The institution of marriage does seem to have degenerated in our country. Albert Camus wrote that "bourgeoise marriage has put our country into slippers and will soon lead it to the gates of death." I am not against marriage. In fact I wish I was in a good marriage myself at this very moment. But I am raising the question concerning the actual state of adult romantic relationships both inside and outside of the institution. To me the important thing is keeping love alive. And in a way that is my lifetime occupation. What else is the true business of creation, of art, of writing? It is in my estimation to create a world of desire that stands in place of the mundane world you & i too easily accept in its decadent state. I mean this literally. I am writing a handbook for love. It may take me a lifetime to complete.
The only true marriage I recognize is one of consenting equals. And it looks to me what we now have for the most part is an institution of slavery: Owners & victims. Well, we asked for it. We start out with the assumption a good marriage is based on true love between a man and a woman of equal parts. These two individual persons decided without coercion from the outside world to enter into a secular and sacred union and to become one person (a mystical union) sacramentalized in the marriage ceremony. In fact marriage is one of the 7 sacraments in the Roman Catholic Church. Is this the actual marriage situation that exists in America today: A union of equals whose freedom is extended by this formal bond which liberates the two persons from the distractions of a wildly sexual & Pleasure-loaded society of promiscuous objects of Desire that surround them on all sides? This is not what I am given to feel. What I feel & have felt for a long time is that marriage today among my contemporaries is merely a facade that conceals a totally unequal series of relationships between the "designated" partners who entered into a "marriage contract."
RLG copyright 2006
posted by rlg at 3:56 PM
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